Remember when I use to write on my blog?  Well, maybe this will become a habit again, or maybe this is just a once-in-a-long-time kind of thing, but after spending the day with my Emma yesterday, I really wanted to take a minute and write a few things down.
First after we dropped off Jonathan at the school I asked her if she wanted to ride with me up front.  You know if we are both sitting in our separate rows, we tend to escape into our little worlds.  So she came up front and we settled in for a nice ride to town, talking about different things.  I love how observant she is, noticing little things as we ride together.  We had a couple errands to run, then we stopped at Starbucks for coffee and hot chocolate.

 It was good.  Then we headed it Walmart, to do our shopping.  We had a long list, but we only had a half hour before the show started.  We managed to get our shopping done, and Emma was a huge help pushing the heavy cart while I ran down aisles to find everything on the shopping list.  She hung out with the cart while I backtracked 5 times to find things I had forgotten.  And she had good ideas for things that we needed.  One of the best parts of Christmas is watching Emma take the whole month to buy gifts, and wrap them for her whole family.  She doesn't forget anyone, even the dog and cat have gifts.  When she was little and didn't have money she had earned from all her chores, she just wrapped up whatever she could find: rocks, unused items sitting around the house, things you love that you have forgotten about - like Scott's favorite diecast model car.  Now she has money that she has earned and saved, and she has spend countless dollars on gifts for everyone.  She asks them what they want, then shops for them, sometimes in stores at our School's Christmas store or on line.  It is so sweet!!!
So it was fun to spend one more day together before Christmas.  And to end it we went and saw Annie.  She had seen the preview, but really had no idea what it was about.  It was fun watching her enjoy the magic of the musical story.   Yes, it is different then the original, but it is just as sweet as ever.  And I loved the look on her face when she hears Annie is 10 just like her!!!  it was priceless!!!

After the movie was over we headed home, chatting about the movie and other things.  It was so good to just have a day together.  She is a fun, imaginative kid, full of heart and overflowing with joy!!!  Love you Emma!!!

Wedding and flower arrangements

Lisa and the girls
The whole group, quite the bunch of kids!!!

can I just say it - Awwww

Lisa and Leah, growing up into beautiful women

Laney and Emma helped me get all the flowers in the arch.

The bridesmaids. I had such fun doing their bouquets!!

Laney and Jessica, two very beautiful flower girls

life at the beach

Summer is here!!! So exciting. So every minute of our day is planned around when will the sunshine!! I am so thankful for the little spot where we live. It truly is heaven on earth. We walk over to the beach on the pond between showers, or we camp there for the day. If I want to make a nice dinner, I take my bike. This way I can ride back, throw chicken in the oven, ride back, throw some rice on, then everyone returns for a nice homecooked supper.

When it is going to be a super hot day, then I try to make a trip to the ocean possible. It is just an hour and a half away. The other day we had a 90 degree predicted with no sea breeze. We went to our favorite spot on the beach and enjoyed a day of sun, waves and sand.

My other favorite summer past time is reading favorite books. I started Anne of Green Gables again. I don't know why, but even after at least a dozen times through I still love this book, every page. I still get choked up when I read about the beautiful dress Matthew gets Anne. And I know I will cry when he dies!!! I love seeing the relationship between Marilla and Anne grow, and how Anne's heart is so open and how Marilla slowly opens her heart.

My garden is growing. I love watching my zucchini grow, and I can just taste my spinach and chard. I am waiting for big leaves before I pick them!!! Tomatoes are getting big, so exciting!!!

Well, I would post more, but... I am off to the beach!!!

Where did the last 6 months go??

Okay, so I finally realized that no one was going to write here if I didn't do it. No kidding, I know, I know, facebook status updates is not the best way to keep track of your life. I really do like keeping this blog cause it is a way for me to remember all that has gone on over the years. And of course a great way for you to share in my crazy thoughts and bizarre life pattern.

It is weird to come here and think " I am not a missionary anymore". Course I know that isn't true, that we are all missionaries, but that our career as missionaries has stopped for now at least. I will miss it so much, though I must say that this past week as I taught at the local school, subbing in many different grades, that no matter where I go or what we do, as long as I can have a part in kids lives, I am feel like I am doing what I should be doing.

My married life, too has changed drastically. First we moved off the school base, also known as the fish bowl. Since then I have felt like I can enjoy my personal time with Scott more, that I don't have to feel like people are just around the corner. I can talk and not worry that someone will show up at the door at any minute. I can cry, yell, laugh or whatever and not have to wonder if someone hears me. It is quite freeing.

My married life has also changed as Scott recovers from his accident. I have had to carry more responsibilities, be the one to jump up and give a helping hand, juice, heating pad, ice, put socks on, or fix his hair. It is a change, yet it is good, I am realizing how much Scott does each day to make me feel special, how he cares and worries about everyone. He is getting better each day and really is close to normal, as the pain in one place subsides he notices other places he is hurting, but I think it is all good, he is getting better and this is great news.

It makes me sad to think he doesn't have his bike. He dreamed of this summer through the last three years, talked of it to his kids, and had it here waiting for him when we arrived. It was his get away from life, yet it was also so handy, our second vehicle. Boy could we use one of those right now. Now what is he going to do??? We kayak and we walk, but he so loved that bike. If he had any memory at all of the accident it might make it easier to think of riding again, but right now he really isn't that excited about getting back on a bike.

The kids have adjusted well to life in the states, even with all the hard times. First with us not sure if we would go to Michigan, and they waited patiently as the decisions came together. Than it was the jobs, and as we wait to see if Scott will get a job, they have to put their little dreams on hold. We are going to the fair next week. This is a BIG deal here in Maine, and they are quite excited. There are lots of fun rides at the fair and they will have a great time. The hard part for Laney coming back in is the constant talk at the school about germs, flu, etc. She worries so much, but we are trying to help her put these concerns into perspective.

I am happy to be here, I do wish it wasn't so far away from family. I really miss them. I haven't seen any of them since I got home in May, but I did get to spend time with them in December, and we are praying we can go out west for Christmas. Especially to see my sister before she and her family head back to Africa.

I am busy with my gardens this week, now that it is raining, it is a good time to transplant. I hope i can get some more done this week, I have been working every day, so I have had to put the flowers on hold, but maybe Saturday between showers I can finish.
Well, that is about all I can think of to write right now, it is all random and crazy, but at least it is something. I hope I can write more often as life settles down here and we snuggle in for winter.

Adverbs, Short stories, and a giggling girl

So we are winding up our year. This means that short stories are due in just a week, and we have reached the end of our grammar book. In some ways it is my favorite part of the year. I love reading the stories these kids write. First, of course, they have had quite the unusual lives, so they have some neat experiences to draw from, that and the fact their brains haven't been fried by too much tv. I like the part when they hand them in (the rough drafts ) and I get to read them and help develop the plot and clean up the story line. I like writing, but I think I like the editing process better. So that has been what I have been doing lately. One girl's story is really fun, cause I have actually been to the tribe where she grew up, and made the hour trip into the woods with her and her family. I can picture the trip as she describes the biannual journey from the northern part of Brazil to here in central Brazil, it is not an easy one, let me tell you!!
Then we are winding up grammar. Last week and this week we worked on adverbs. I know I have been getting to deep into the subject when it continues all night in my dreams. Things like, Adverbs can be anywhere in a sentence, well, almost anywhere, before or after a verb, or in the middle of a verb phrase, or at the beginning of a sentence. Then we learned that adverb phrases come immediatly after the adjective or adverb it modifies, and that adverbs come immediatly before the adverbs or adjectives they modify, then there are adverb clauses that start with those lovely subordinating conjunctions, and they can come at the beginning of a sentence or after the word they modify. Are you seeing why I am having nightmares. I try to tell the kids that adverbs are simple, then get lost in the explanation. Ahhhhhh but we have held on, and managed to get through that section, now we are on to sentence structures... I won't even try to explain all the different structures there are!!! But we had fun. I realized that I love puzzles, and connecting random things, that is why I love grammar. I encourage the kids that if they don't understand it, they must at least memorize everything then they can just fill in the answers and get on to the next thing ( that was how I passed geometry).
I do love these kids, they are always ready to laugh, and we do lots, especially when we are tired of grammar and enjoy just making fun of the horrible sentences they have in the book to work with. I am going to miss this group, they are unique and normal and always ready to enjoy life.
So on top of grammar and short stories I have a little girl who is growing up. She is full of energy and sometimes I can't believe how big she is getting ( especially when I pick her up to put her on the back of my bike). She will be 5 in July!!!! I didn't notice this silly thing so much with Jonathan and Laney - they kept each other so well entertained. Emma gets bored, and she gets silly and soon you realize she is just bouncing off the walls. If I let her outside she picks every flower off my plants, sits by the fish pond and fills it full of sticks, leaves and grass, or is in the dirt road playing with mud or rocks. If that fails to entertain she finds the cats and torments them. On the brighter side, she doesn't run off to the playground or a friends house as much!!! Whenever you tell her to do ( or not do ) something she says "okay!" but then you go inside, and she is right back at it!!! So we get out her puzzles and she does all 10 of them and then is ready for something else. I have tried to keep her from watching much TV ( I am sick of Wally - after watching it just a few times, she walks around for hours playing Wally) but I think the more she gets up and moves the more she gets up and moves. I have seen her spend a half an hour or more with a piece of paper opening and closing it and laughing. But she is always happy!!!

The definition of trust

So yesterday was one of those days, where my patience was at it's end. I am tired of waiting to know what our future holds and was praying for a way out of this situation. I don't want to go through this trial, I want OUT!!!
I was talking to my mom and she said "you need to just trust God" and I quickly replied "Mom, I am not worried about what my future holds, I just want to know what it is!!!" She said again, you just need to trust God".
Well, I thought, I am!!
So last night was our ladies Bible study and we covered Daniel in the lions den. And I opened my Bible to Daniel chapter 6 and across the page was a devtional that said "Learning to wait on God:Trust" Amazing, Daniel was simply waiting for the morning, and deliverance. Sue Monk Kidd says " if like Daniel you are waiting in some den of helplessness, won't you spend the time as he did - trusting God?"
Hmmm
Trust is something I do while I am waiting??
Here are some of the definitions of trust...
Trust used as a verb -
1.
to rely upon or place confidence in someone or something
2.
to have confidence; hope
Synonym
1. certainty, belief, faith. Trust, assurance, confidence imply a feeling of security. Trust implies instinctive unquestioning belief in and reliance upon something: to have trust in one's parents. Confidence implies conscious trust because of good reasons, definite evidence, or past experience: to have confidence in the outcome of events.
-Dictionary.com UnabridgedBased on the Random House Dictionary, © Random House, Inc. 2009

Did you see that first sentence? Trust implies a feeling of security??
And it is an unquestioning belief?

So am I trusting God as I wait?? I am afraid not.

Lord teach me to trust you, to wait in the security of your presence, knowing without a doubt that even the answer when it comes is also part of you plan, not just the answer. How your timing is not my timing.

Philippians 4:6,7
Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.
And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus.

I can pray about the need for an answer, trusting Him, with confidence and hope that he will answer, thanking Him for all that He has done for me, from the beginning of my walk with him until now. The amazing security that comes from understanding that He has plans for me, plans to prosper me and to give me a hope and a future. (Jeremiah 29:11)

Thank you Lord!!!

The process of letting go

The next step is here - return to the states and interview with the leadership at our NTM Bible Schools for a job.

Our flights are booked and we leave the 28th of May. Soon after we arrive - like within days - we will drive or fly to Michigan for the job interview.

So many questions come to mind as we head this way.


1.) When would we move??


2.) How much will it cost to live in the USA, will our support be sufficient?


3.) Where will our kids go to school?


4.) What will my job be?


and so on...


But first we have to move.


This process is not like the typical moving process. We must sell almost everything. We get 10 suitcases and 5 carry ons to bring all that we treasure most - and also the necessary things ( like tax record for 7 years!!!). A few people here have offered suitcases, since most people returning to the US are just going for a month or two they don't need all that space. But still at the most I can see us having around 15 70 pounds suitcases to pack.


So we must sell, give away or throw away the rest - you know the stuff you hang on to that has not value to anyone but you - like kids school projects, cards old videos etc. Then when we return to the US and we must decide what we need to replace or what can we live without. A lot of the stuff we are selling are things we need to replace - yes, even the kids toys, hopefully we can find stuff at garage sales for good deals...


Most of our kids toys, and most of our books will stay.


Most of my kitchen stuff will stay, bedding, curtains, pillows, etc,


Of course, all furniture will stay.

What goes with? our favorite stuff, like the kids favorite toys, my decorations and pictures that give our home the same feel no matter where we live, clothes, of course my scrapbooks ( man are they heavy) and card making supplies!!! My favorite books, and smaller kitchen tools. Quilts, computers, DVD's (thank goodness those are smaller than videos) and so on. It is exhausting!!! You try to imagine what is going to fit in our few suitcases and hope for the best.


The hard part is that we are selling our stuff to friends and co-workers. People with little money, and big needs. How do you ask for a fair price. I can't ask what it will cost to replace it if I am going to buy it new - I am selling a used product, yes, a lot of these items I brought from the US, and you can't find them here, still is it fair, I don't know??


As you can see it is hard to let go.


I do think we have put good prices on the stuff, as most is already spoken for, just a few things to sell.


So please pray for us as we go through this, it isn't easy, I find myself worn out with the thinking.